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Monday, June 28, 2010
Upset.

It seems as though you don't care at all, not even a bit. What I fear most, could be coming true soon. I have always been mum about it, it does not give you a bit of opportunity to take it against me. Its an everyday routine for you to be ego, to keep saying that its always you ending up saying sorry not having to think once or twice that once upon a time, you could be hurting someone and with you not realising it. Mishaps happens. But your words are deceiving most of the time. I don't rely on you to make fairy tales happen but with those deceiving words of yours have definitely crossed my mind in thinking, what is exactly happening?

I have to put up a rueful smile and say, things are getting better when its not. There are ups and downs. I expect you to least put me as your first to do list each day. Its tough not having to think about you. Do I need to put up reminders all over again? I'm on the verge of probably breaking down and possibly, I've been putting away thoughts of my past just because I thought you could actually grant my wish to be the one that does not disappoints me. Gloomy not so fluffy clouds are surrounding me. I wish I could be really strong and tell you, maybe its time you go. That might just ruin my 2010.

I try to think positive. Whenever I try, you end up winning. Just because you are the older and mature, it does not give you a right to be correct. Maybe I thought you could be my lifeline forever not. It hurts even if you can't see it. Being tired but having to hang out with your fellow friends? Are you lying just to get me off my back? I've been aching to know the truth that you have been keeping to yourself. Can you sit, think and speak?

Have to admit that I can't even have my say with you because you are no more listening to what I say. Instead, you will have me irritated. I want to tell you how neglected I feel. Why do you always think I'm having the swings?
Eh wait.....

Knock, knock. Are you even listening?